i have been on exile.

number 1, i have spent the long weekend at my parents' house, that in itself is a punishment. i still wonder why i keep on caring for other human beings when i clearly end up hating myself for it, but thats a different entry altogether.

number 2, i have no internet access for the past three days. fortunately, there's enough wine to distract me from the online equivalent of being marooned in an island. although, there have been brief moments of sobriety wherein i wonder what everyone's talking about, in which case i feel like an outcast all over again, which in turn would make me refill my glass of vino.

number 3, i have just finished the latest full season of White Collar on DVD, and as it is everytime i finish a TV series, im left with a feeling of emptiness that only another full season of a different TV show can fill.

imagine how trapped, alone and empty i feel. then, imagine how shallow my life is.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

i read an interesting observation somewhere that is truly descriptive of my intellectual state as of late: women like me are in need of intellectual challenges--conversations, reading material-- because there's not much of that for the most part of being around small kids all day, everyday.

my son, who's seven but look's eight and thinks like a 10 year old, is smart enough for me to not join those homeschooling, soccer parents in their quest for the perfect educational system. my work pays my dismal part of the bills and allows me to bully my staff every now and then, so im not complaining. my husband, as much as i want him here, is 11000 miles away in a different continent, but i talk to him every morning about everything so thats the closest thing to a perfect long distance relationship that i can get.

now i don't know where i got the idea that complaining about something is a form of intellectual exercise. it must be all the folk music i listened to in college.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++